2002-08-16T02:55:00.000-07:00

If we women ever made sense, then you must be a god among men. =)

uhhh... yeah.

2002-08-16T02:47:00.000-07:00

Jesus H. Christ!

When am I going to get my break?!

2002-08-10T00:54:00.000-07:00

I finished a story again. I asked about submitting. He said he'd take a look.

Not that sure about my ending but... I sent it anyway.

Cross your fingers kiddies...

2002-08-09T23:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was pretty devastating.

“You can’t write for shit.” Someone said to me. Well, that wasn’t exactly what he said (It was actually a very nice, “constructive criticism” letter) but I’m very pessimistic about these things and that’s how it felt. It was an e-mail telling me the “weaknesses” of my recent writing style, based on the last story I wrote. But as I read it, it felt like the whole thing was “you can’t write for shit” and “give it up man, you’re doing it all wrong” repeated over and over again.

Crap.

I txtd a friend asking for a pick-me-up. She suggested that it was probably just a case of the “footstool syndrome” (If I remember correctly), that the guy was just trying to make me feel low to feel superior. I dismissed the thought. I’m pretty sure he meant well. I mean, we’ve been critiquing each other’s work for some time now (well, mostly me critiquing his work since he’s more prolific. I think he’s only read three of mine.). The stuff he said made sense and well, I’m not surprised since he knows the ropes. He has been writing far longer than I have after all ( I only started looking for “professional” writing work this January).

But it still sucks to be practically told by someone else that all your work is for nothing because you’re doing it all wrong, that you’ll have to give-up the technique you’ve grown to love because that’s not how its supposed to be done (and no, you can’t be “unique” in this field, not when you’re still a nobody). Total bummer.

Then my friend rescues me from the pits of despair after she sends me this SMS:

Well somebody said the Beatles wouldn’t make it. Ditto for Elvis, M. Monroe, Einstein. :)

I dunno if I was reading that right but it felt like she practically said “this is just one of those roadblocks to greatness. Don’t worry, you’ll still get there.” Wow, major ego boost. The she jokingly added that I any thoughts of suicide or committing a killing spree should be purged from my mind. Funny. I replied that those things are definitely not in my future agenda bec. a) guns are expensive here and b) I realized that the world still needs me. She said she loves the self-centered me better.

I do too.

2002-08-09T04:15:00.000-07:00

People have so many things to do but the problem is knowing which one to prioritize.

I asked myself whether I should start working on my thesis (due in two months... And I haven't even started the title page) and/or my current projects which I (stupidly?) committed to or start a blog.

Guess which of those won.

I'm really gonna hate myself a few weeks from now.

Trivial